Say...

This past weekend has been an interesting observation of the interplay of relationships and friendships: part persuasion, part high school, part shift-happens, and part pleasant surprises. And yet, what struck me most was that even in our 20s and 30s, so many of us are still afraid to say certain things we really mean, especially to people we are closest to.

Isn't it one of the building blocks of good relationships - that you can call a spade a spade, especially when it comes to your relationship, and expect the other person to at least listen to your POV? Yet, why do we find it easier to vent to someone else, rather than directly confront the person you are actually upset with? On the other hand, if we truly appreciate something, why do most of us tend to hold back? Why is it acceptable, even expected, that we apologize profusely for minor mishaps with strangers, but are viewed as fake when effusive in praise to people around us? Does society or our culture subconciously groom us to downplay appreciation to people in our "inner" circle, but applaud us when we celebrate strangers?

In a lighter vein, when people preface their comments with "honestly speaking,...", should we doubt things that they say without that disclaimer?

I guess theoretically, the answers to these questions are straightforward. But, in reality, it is difficult to implement their obvious solutions. I guess that's why life is, well, not exactly a walk in the park. But, I do hope that one of these days, sooner rather than later, each of us will, in the words of a popular song, say what we need to say:

"...Even if your hands are shaking
And your faith is broken
Even as the eyes are closing
Do it with a heart wide open
Say what you need to say
Say what you need to say..."
~ J.Mayer